How to Name Your Baby Without Being Cursed
by SlytherinQueen83
Summary: Only Fred Weasley would dare to contradict a pregnant Hermione, and when they can't seem to agree on a name for their iminent baby, thing get a little crazy in the Weasley house. Poor Freddie won't know what hit him.  product idea from wizards-pupil


_This is a story that my dear friend liliacupcake376 and I came up with as we were talking about our favorite pairings one day :) _

_Of course I do not own anything related to Harry potter, all charecters belong to J.K Rowling. I only WISH that George was mine ;)_

How to Name Your Baby (Without Being Cursed)

There once was a house in the hills. The house was a two-storey home with large windows and a porch that wrapped around the house. In this house lived Fred Weasley and his wife Hermione (nee Granger) with their young daughter, Rose.

Fred worked at a joke shop that he owned with his twin brother, George. The twins' busiest time of year was approaching and their legendary teamwork just wasn't working. The cause? Fred's wife was pregnant with their second child.

Now Hermione was known to be intelligent, kind and occasionally stubborn. It was an uncommon occurrence when Fred and Hermione didn't agree on anything and fought. While Hermione was logistic and stubborn, Fred was creative and care-free. Usually when they came to a disagreement Hermione would work out a logical solution and Fred would agree; if he didn't he would find a creative way to make a solution. As with all couples, there came a time in their relationship that Hermione and Fred just couldn't agree on anything. This time just happened to be when they were deciding on a name for their unborn child.

"Rose honey, don't play with those, Daddy hasn't tested them yet" Hermione said to her three year old. Rose looked up at her mother with brown doe eyes thinking that her undeniable cuteness would melt her mother's heart as it does her father's. Hermione looked at her daughter sternly causing Rose to put down the Exploding Eggs.

"Where did you find these?" Hermione asked, her tone slightly hysterical.

"in the kitchen mummy" Rose said innocently.

"Alright then but next time, don't take things from places if you don't know what they are or who put them there," She scolded.

Rose hung her head and mumbled an apology. Hermione took pity on her daughter and sent her outside to play with her cousins. She then glanced around the kitchen for the offending objects "_wow" _Hermione thought "_I really need to clean the kitchen! Not as if Fred'll do it, he'll just say it has _character _this way" _there they were, lying on the kitchen table in plain sight of a 3 year old, in a big red basket with a note tied to it, saying;

"Just Fininshed these this morning, thought you'd like to do the honor of testin em out ;) –love Forge!"

Damn it! Thought Hermoine, how could he do that! You'd think that having 2 kids of his own would have made George a little more responsible, but some people never change she thought wryly. She then took the eggs and put them on top of the refrigerator, so rosie couldn't reach them, on thinking about this she realized that she had better find a more secure location for the eggs…for being three years old, Rosie was VERY much her father's daughter.

Playing with Rosie since the girl woke up and now dealing with the surprise eggs really exhausted her. So Hermione quickly organized the kitchen to a slightly decent state of cleanliness and curled up on the couch in their adjoining living room with an updated version _of Hogwarts: A History, Post-War Edition._ Hermione sighed in contentment as she enjoyed one of her favorite books and listened to the distant sound of her daughter and two nephews playing in the yard, their mother was probly resting too she thought with a laugh, poor girl was expecting identical twin girls (the cause of MUCH excitement for their father and uncle) in less than a month…

SLAM! "Your favorite wizard is home once again, eager to see his two favorite ladies!" came the much too loud voice of Fred Weasley, echoing through the living room. Hermione shreaked, jumping with a start and falling out of her chair onto the floor.

"Hullo love! Did I wake you?" he asked, his voice giving away the lopsided grin that was surely plastered on his face.

"Yes you did! ... And why on earth would you think it was a good idea to leave your untested products all over the place for Rose to find! She's THREE for Merlin's sake!" the frustration of her day and from being woken flooding out at her husband who was staring at her with a slightly confused expression.

"Rosie got into something? She ok?" his face looking concerned for his baby girl. When Hermione nodded her head he chuckled.

"UUURGH!" Hermione yelled as she stormed out of the room, her hormonal frustration and rage rolling off of her in nearly tangible waves.

Sensing he was in some serious trouble, and his wife was quite upset, Fred followed her into the kitchen and placed an arm around her thin shoulders with one arm and rubbing soothing circles on her large stomach with the other.

"I didn't mean to upset you love, honest" he said with a smile "you know I would never do anything to either of my girls, I love you too much" (wink) "I just laughed because I was relieved, you should be more worried if I WASN'T laughing" as he finished speaking, Hermione turned to meet his gaze, and burst out laughing along with her husband. "I'm sorry, I'm just so TIRED all the time, and I get mad at you and Rosie for so easily, it isn't fair to you" she said as she gave Fred a big hug (as big as the bump in between them would allow)

"Whoa!" gasped Fred "what!" Hermione asked slightly panicked "I just felt little Freddie kick me!" he said grinning "…" "…" "What did you just call our baby?" Hermione asked ominously. Not to be deterred by his hormonal wife, Fred smiled "Freddie of course! That's his name! I've been thinking about it a lot and there isn't a better name in the world for our little sprog" he grinned lopsidedly

"And what if our baby is a girl Fred Weasley? What then!" Hermione was becoming slightly hysterical. "Well Winifred is a perfectly lovely name I think, we'll just call her Freddie for short!" SPLAT a muffin flew across the kitchen and smacked against the wall as Fred quickly dodged the projectile food that his wife was becoming famous for throwing when she got into one of her "moods".

"WE CANNOT CALL OUR DAUGHTER FRED!" yelled Hermione "what makes you so sure it's a girl!" countered Fred "I'm the mum!" "That's ridiculous, you can't know for sure!" "How would YOU know YOU'VE NEVER BEEN PREGNANT!" "At least Fred is a much nicer name than HUGO!" yelled Fred, poking fun at the ONLY boy name Hermione had picked out in there constant argument on what their baby would be called. "FRED WEASLEY! HUGO IS AN EXCELLENT NAME! THERES NO REASON WHY WE SHOULDN'T CALL OUR SON HUGO" "I COULD COME UP TONNES OF REASONS WHY THAT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA!" "and naming a girl FRED is better!" "you are being completely unreasonable Hermione! I could write you a whole BOOK on why Fred is a better name for our kid!" Fred said sarcastically.

There was a pause in which Fred felt sure that he had gone too far, he had said something that would make his lovely wife cry. Fred hated it when Hermione cried, it made him feel awful, because there was nothing he loved more than listening to Hermione laugh with him and to see her smile. Fred made his way over to the other side of the counter where Hermione was standing and as he was about to place his hand on her shoulder she spoke again, her voice strangely calm and quiet considering the volume it had held only moments before. "Well I suppose we'll see about that".

"What?" "…" "Hermione?" "…" "Love?" Fred was seriously worried at this point, for having known his wife for almost 10 years and being married to her for 4, he knew her very well…whatever his wife was about to say, he knew he was in some serious trouble. Silence continued to fill the air between them until Hermione finally said "I'll be expecting a 13 foot essay on why we should name our child Fred on Wednesday evening" in such a business-like tone, Fred could almost swear he saw the prefect badge glimmer against her chest. As Fred finally realized his wife was indeed completely serious, she was already nowhere to be seen.

Fred was marveling at how fast his wife was able to move while carrying a stomach roughly the size of a small watermelon, when he realized with a lurch in his stomach that today was Tuesday. Merlin's pants…well that's what he got for marrying Hermione Granger.

He hoped he would at least be able to keep this one from George. Not likely.

_Remember everyone, reviewing is magicool so let me know what you think!_


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